Grow up Sud!

Seeing my almost 18 month to-be son grow takes me back to my own childhood. While I naturally  did not expect both the experiences to be similar, I was also not prepared to see such stark distinctions as well.

Children today are no longer just that, but are prince & princesses! Not only are they called so but am afraid are also treated such and are led into believing and behaving as one. A small evidence can be found in the growing number of couples celebrating their angels' birthdays every month by cutting a cake! Not meaning any offense to the parents indulging in monthly celebrations & realizing fully well that it is purely a personal choice, it still bothers me to think whether the child would experience the joy of waiting eagerly for the yearly birthday celebration. Coming back to my stance on how we raise them, I always wonder What right do we then have to sneer at their  reactions however unreasonable when faced with a "no" after having set such high standards and upping their expectations to match that of someone whose every wish needs to be heeded. Also to be seen is their collective behavior at school when each is raised as a prince and princess coming to terms with other kids that are all raised as specially.  The love of the parents from the previous generations' had towards their children was perhaps not as overtly exhibited as it is by this generation parents. Therefore, it was perhaps easier for us as kids to be one amongst many.

While today's parents treat kids in a very special way, they do not seem to be adopting the same attitude when it comes to letting them achieve their milestones at their own pace. Competing with other parents on their kids reaching milestones starting from infancy even with respect to when they roll over, crawl, walk, talk and the list just continues. These 'helicopter parents' then assemble their wards' with strict daily time tables while on the other hand are those parents showing extreme leniency. Just the way it is difficult for kids to understand the significance of education at such a tender age it is also equally tough for them to align to a 'can't miss a day at school, can't miss a mark, can't make a mistake & should never fail' kind of set rules'.In spite of completely being aware of the cut throat competition the kids would later face in their lives once they hit the big bad world, the parents from the previous generations seem to have let their children to be. In such discussions we should of course allow for generous leeway for exceptions in each generation.

To be fair with both the set of parents, the environment or the backdrop in which the kids are raised has also significantly altered. Aspects such as greater access to information as a double edged sword cutting across better awareness vying with higher levels of confusion see-saw with the concept of 'follow the ancestral path laid down by the grandparents'. Adding further to this chaos is the factor of raising kids in a multi-cultural context for the present day parents tussling with decisions on whether to adopt, adapt or ignore becoming more frequent. Something as common as children co-sleeping with the parents to vegetarianism in a specific cutture might completely be alien to another. Decisions in such instances tend to become ambiguous. Significantly different also are the support mechanisms both generation parents had and have, with physical support being more common for our parents, technological strength is our asset: how many of us might not have thanked profusely the disposable nappies to say the least at some point?

It's not just the parenting styles that has changed over the generations (I only talk about my generation & the current one), the attitude of children themselves seem to have changed. While a single or at max a couple of toys would have kept us excited for a long time then, any number of toys, technology, outside exposure doesn't seem to satiate the need to explore & understand the world for the current kids resulting in their early initiation into playschools. Reciting nursery rhymes, ABC's, 123s even prior to entering their third year seems to be the order of the day while I  remember struggling with learning alphabets in the lower case often confusing between 'f' & 'b' & 'g' & many more at double that age!

Balancing between these two extreme spectrums then becomes quite essential, a task that is perhaps easier said than done!

Work Life Balance

Not someone to write a travel blog, I am still forced into posting this entry because of the ripples of thought a recent visit to a great eastern country stirred in me.

A short visit to this vast country made me realize that God has been very equitable in distributing the nature's beauty. This country has fantastic beaches, mountains, desert & snow!

While we marveled at the god created & man made attractions, a lot of friendly people around offered to take photographs of our family for us, something I had not experienced before. Though these incidents, faces will go a long way down the memory lane & bring a smile on my face whenever I think of them, this post is about something else, something more profound - at least for me. So without drifting further, I will make my point.

Having come from a background that focussed on consumerism, the early closing hours of the shops in this country had me wondering if it made economic sense to limit the shopping time. Though never very strong in academics, the only thing I was sure was that governments & corporates mostly benefitted when people spent - for fulfilling a need or no, by impulse or otherwise, with cash or credit, on local made goods or imported products, and longer the hours, more the spending, my not so fast processor told me. Unable to keep my confusion to myself, I had confided my thoughts to a close friend, a local in that country. Her reply not just offered me enlightenment but also had me floored. It was quite simple (for her), she said that the people spent their evenings not in busy malls where they sold zillions of things, but at homes - with their families & that the government encouraged a work-life balance, a term quite familiar to the 'HR' by profession me. When an advanced country could imbibe this concept, I appall at why corporates that probably give birth to such lip service jargons find it challenging to practice it in letter & in spirit.

Cook right to eat right - the Ayurvedic way

As someone who has not cooked until hitting the quarter century mark in terms of age and without a formal initiation into this art, I sometimes depend on the cooking shows both online and off it. Thanks to my little experiments, mom's on-call help and the ubiquitous cooking shows I have turned out to be a decent cook in a little under five years. While in the beginning my focus had been to produce something edible I learnt along the way, the real art or science (depending on the way one views it) of food per se.

With such tremendous scope for experimentation and cultural variations there is no wonder that there can be as many styles of cooking as there are people living on this planet. "Delicious, exotic and presentable"  besides the hep "low-cal" phenomenon seem to be the most trending objectives for cooking, whereas "wholesome, nutritious and well balanced" seem to have lost their race somewhere along the line by simply remaining as sale-able propositions as has the linkage between eating right and staying better. Amidst this increased importance to eating tastier food we seem to have deleted  simple and less processed foods from our menus such as, "rasam", a south Indian soup cooked with great digestives including cumin, asafetida and pepper.

Earlier the art of cooking greatly used the principles from the science of Ayurveda (I only speak of Indian vegetarian cooking as I know of no other) but now I notice that this has completely been lost and forgotten at least in our generation. While as a self declared foodie, I enjoy good food, but in parallel I am also conscious of the damage that can be done to humanity by forgetting the authentic style of cooking - using the correct combination of ingredients (which is probably more important than knowing the right proportions) and the exact procedure - that I am confident was laid on foundations of health and fitness. By right procedure, I mean for instance simple things such as  cutting leafy vegetables and pumpkins into large chunks to retain their nutrients. 

Authentic cooking - as per my definition is something that maximizes the nutritional gains while still being tasty. Also, the more processed the food, the lesser the benefit will it provide in terms of nutrition. 

While food needs to be palatable I am against the rants most chefs seem to be making on popular shows on combining and multiplying ingredients that simply should not be used together for wrong reasons such as for increasing food appeal. For instance, combining spinach and tomato for the color it brings out when actually these two should not be mixed together but Okra or ladies fingers should always be cooked together with tomato and onions. Yes, cooking has a great scope for personalization but this I believe should not go against the principles of cooking healthy food.  

While cooking shows and recipe books can teach us to cook exotic dishes only our mothers' and grandmothers' kitchens have secrets to a healthier cooking. Now, lets go and figure!

The Age of Excesses

The recent inflated prices of vegetables in India made me feel strongly about the way our lifestyle has changed since my childhood. For the better? I am not too sure.

Call me old fashioned but I still prefer getting new clothes only for festive occasions and for birthdays, than just going on a purchasing spree whenever there is a sale which is forever in places like Singapore. And of course this trend is soon catching up in India as well.

Rich food was again only limited to special occasions like festivals, weddings & so on. Now a days I am sure a lot of households' must haves in the grocery shopping list would include sweetmeats, chocolates, ice creams, cakes & the like. That brings me to another interesting observation - we do not mind spending for these so called special treats but complain, crib for buying veggies not before thinking for umpteen times & finally deciding to call off when their prices get inflated. The health factor anyways gets affected and along with it goes down the feeling of exclusivity that comes from treating ourselves occasionally to a cake, for instance. May be we live in the times when eating rich food is the daily norm and nutritious food on special occasions.

Anyways, reverting to my nostalgia - going out used to be again a once in a while occasion either for eating out or rarely for the cinemas. These days there are lot more options available for hanging out. While i agree that these outings give one a much required exposure I certainly wish we gave things such as catching up with relatives, attending social gatherings the importance they deserved. Mingling with people still betters our social skills than window shopping in a mall or making friends with gizmos do, or so I reckon!

With my son's birthday just around the corner and with all those I consider as fond childhood memories turning into routine daily activities I wonder the kind of special memories he will have. Let's see!

The digestive fire of life

Agni or the “digestive fire,” is one of the most important principles in the ancient science of ayurveda. It refers broadly to our ability to process all aspects of life, including food, experiences, memories, and sensory impressions. Agni is responsible for absorbing the nutrients and essential elements the body needs while burning off waste products (agni is the root of the English word “ignite”).

If our agni is strong, we’re able to digest food efficiently and easily assimilate our daily experiences. On the other hand, if agni is weak, our body won’t digest well, creating toxic residue or ama that lodges deep in our cells.


According to ayurvedic teaching, strong agni leads to excellent health and well-being, while the accumulation of ama results in the slow deterioration of the body and—ultimately—disease. The inability to metabolize emotions produces just as much toxic residue as undigested food. In fact, pent-up anger, long-held sadness, and lingering guilt are more debilitating for most people than problems with physical digestion.
Ojas: The Vital Nectar of Life

If we desire perfect health, it’s crucial to eliminate the ama stored in our body and focus on producing ojas, which is the essential life energy. A Sanskrit term meaning “vigor,” ojas is the pure and subtle substance that’s extracted from food that has been completely digested. Ojas circulates throughout the bodily tissues and heart, sustaining the physical self, bringing clarity to the mind and balancing the emotions. In short, when the body produces ojas, the vital nectar of life, we feel blissful. The cells sing with happiness because both the mind and the body are receiving the nourishment they need.

To promote the creation and flow of ojas, we need a good diet focused on pure foods, referred to as “sattvic” in ayurveda. The body can easily digest sattvic food and extract its ojas or prime energy. The most sattvic foods include organic milk, almonds, sesame, honey, rice, and fruits. It’s not necessary to eat these foods exclusively — just focus on having them on a regular basis.

Some foods are difficult if not impossible for the body to convert into ojas, including meat, poultry, fish, oily foods, cheese, leftovers, processed food, and items with an excess of sour or salty tastes. Food that has been canned, frozen, or reheated won’t produce as much ojas as freshly prepared meals. In addition, consuming alcohol and smoking cigarettes destroys ojas.

The following chart will help you determine whether you have healthy ojas or an accumulation of ama in your body. If you’ve been storing toxicity, you can choose now to begin to nourish yourself and enjoy increasing levels of joy and well-being in your life.

Signs of Ojas
You feel rested upon awakening
Your skin has a healthy glow
Your tongue is clear and pink
Your body feels light, regardless of the number on the scale
You feel centered throughout the day
Your digestion is strong without bloating Generalized pain
You feel energized & enthusiastic
Your mind is clear
Your body has a pleasant smell
You rarely get sick


Signs of Ama
Bad breath
Coated tongue
Dull appetite
Delicate digestion
Sluggish or irritable elimination
Fatigue
Depression
Susceptibility to infections
Difficulty manifesting intentions

Creating Nurturing Mealtimes

Our experience while we’re eating is just as important as the kinds of foods we’re consuming. If we’re having a fight with our spouse over the dinner table, our stomach cells are aware of the upset and send distressed chemical messages throughout the body. As a result, we’re not able to create ojas because of the indigestible emotions coursing throughout our cells and organs.

Since ojas is the by-product of all the signals our body receives, we need to create a nurturing atmosphere for our meals, paying attention to all of the senses — taste, sound, sight, touch, and smell. Here are a few tips for making your body happy while you eat:
Eat in a settled atmosphere
Don’t eat when you’re upset.
Always sit down to eat (don’t eat in front of your computer or TV or while you’re driving).
Only eat when you’re hungry.
Dine at a moderate pace. Don’t gulp down your food or eat too slowly.
Minimize raw foods, which are much harder to digest than cooked ones.
Include all six tastes (sweet, sour, astringent, bitter, salty, and pungent) at each meal.

Source: www.chopra.com/agni

To donate or not to

To part with money or not in the first place.
If the decision is in the affirmative, then on whom-self or significant others (spouse, children, parents, numerous relatives, friends) or the needy.

For the needy, ok, some small portion atleast.
Then what kind of need-Those that require food, clothing or shelter, education, medical aid?
Well, say education - then to which needy - boy or girl, Indian or foreigner, Telugu or not, from telangana, rayalaseema or andhra, same caste or different & then the district, village..,,,,

Instead of having to deal with so many choices & making some of the most difficult decisions in life - just follow the tried & tested method and end up buying the nth item for the nth time!

Why can't a needy just remain that without being categorised forever?

Disclaimer : this post is in no way a reflection of how I think or identify a needy.

Standard disclaimer

My blog postings might at best be considered as random thoughts or rather ramblings and are anything but profound. They are not meant to be consequential in the least and therefore, might not lead to conclusions of any sort.